


Jester’s Court

by Killuaandgonarebaby



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Action/Adventure, Aromantic Character, Asexual Character, BL, Bad Parenting, Character Development, Comedy, Dysfunctional Family, Gay, Gen, Gore, Little to no canon characters, M/M, Male Protagonist, Original Character(s), Original Plot, POV Original Character, Slight gay pairings, Slow Updates, hints of romance, parent protagonist, thieves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-27
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-13 06:42:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29024421
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Killuaandgonarebaby/pseuds/Killuaandgonarebaby
Summary: “What I want isn’t something I can take!” The kneeling man sobbed.“There isn’t anything that can’t be stolen.”*Hoku doesn’t have a family.He doesn’t need one.He doesn’t want one.Well, that was the case.Until now he’s been alone. He made himself alone.Now he carries a sunflower on his shoulders and his gang of misfit ruffians are coming to bring him into their family.What is a man to do when he knows nothing of familial bonds, but pretends anyways?





	Jester’s Court

Hoku’s eyes burned unpleasantly from the midday sun, his eyelids failed to shield him from it so he begrudgingly moved his hand over them, successfully making everything go dark. He really wished the damned sun didn’t disturb his difficultly attained sleep. When was the last time he slept? Maybe it was a month or two ago… he was never good at remembering times or anything really. The wind picked up, he could imagine it making his already messy lilac hair even worse than it probably already was, eh whatever, it’s not like it mattered.  
Hoku really didn’t want to move, he just felt too tired for it. Why doesn’t he just sleep more? He couldn’t. Not without screwing himself over in the process. His thin, almost too thin, fingers plucked at the grass around him. The strands were dry as a bone (actually bones are wet, why is that even a saying, or maybe they’re talking about a skeleton from, like, a corpse or something), which was good, considering that meant that it likely didn’t rain on him while he was unconscious.

Now that he was fully awake Hoku realized that something smelt bad, and by bad, he meant very, very bad. With a whine and a groan he forced himself into a half sitting position and looked around him. To his left, a bed of flowers. To his right, grass and the occasional flower. To the front, endless green. And behind him, mushrooms…? Shifting his body into more of a crouch instead of a half-sit, he looked at it closer. After all this wasn't the place you’d often see fungus growing, it was too bright (much to the displeasure of his squinting eyes) and much too open (there wasn’t a damn tree in sight that he could take refuge from the sun in). And so, it wasn’t very surprising that underneath those mushrooms was a still decaying body.  
Oh, damn, he must have eaten him clean, poor guy. It’s also not like he had killed him directly, he just died of dehydration after falling into a coma. He kinda deserved it though, following him home after the exam was over.  
Splotches of discolored pigment decorated the pallid skin hidden under the plants and it had definitely started to smell. It had at most been two weeks. That guy was actually competent, strong enough to give him a week or so of sleep. Too bad, if not for himself the man might have had a chance to pass and become a hunter. Instead he was a fool and threw his life away trying to get petty revenge and followed him all the way out here.  
Don’t get him wrong, he was grateful for the sleep, he doesn’t get much, but that doesn’t make that nameless guy any less of an idiot. 

He should probably go, not only was the smell of a rotting corpse a few feet away from him a little overwhelming, he still vaguely remembered the tot he left back at the village. Getting up was harder than he thought it’d be, the one, skinny platform of his clog-like sandals got caught in some of the taller grass, making it slightly difficult to untangle it. He thought of just taking them off and carrying them in his hands but for some inexplicable reason he really didn’t want to, so he let them be. It wouldn’t really matter, he’d still get to where he’s going eventually.  
After his shoes no longer got stuck in the grass (he had reached an area where the grass was shorter and not up to his shins) he went in the opposite direction from where the sun was starting to set, east maybe? Yeah, east sounded right. The directions were Never Eat Slimy Worms, right? Yeah, definitely. 

Hoku started to walk in an energetic way that didn’t match how heavy his limbs really were, he’d feel better later, it did always take him an hour or so before he didn’t feel dead anymore. 

The red gradually faded into black, the day being over. Sounds of Hoku's wooden shoes crunched against the grass and dirt, alerting all nearby life of his presence. He continued to walk forward, not turning in the slightest. If he did he would undoubtedly lose his way. God knows how many times it's happened before, he still couldn’t comprehend how he managed to do it every time. Oh, wait, he did know. Butterflies, birds, flowers--he was very easily distracted.  
The sun rose and set and rose and set, again and again. Somewhere along the way Hoku diverted from his straight path. He didn’t know when, but he did. If he didn’t he would have already reached the village!  
He was getting irritable, that was no good. He took steadier breaths ‘til he could candidly walk with no care in the world. 

“Hoku,” a small voice so adorable yet uncaring it both made him very proud and undeniably upset came from behind him. “You got lost.” She didn’t phase it like a question. There was no need, she’s known the man long enough to understand some of his habits.  
Looking to the source, Hoku saw the little princess staring blankly up at him. “Taun! Why don’t you call me dad?” He whined, acting more like a child than she ever did. “Come on, come on! Dad—“ Hoku dragged the word out, exaggeratedly pronouncing it like she was a baby about to say her first word. If she didn’t know better she’d think he was an idiot, oh wait--  
Taun paid the big fool no mind, leading the directionally challenged hobo away and towards civilization. 

Children clumsily dashed on and around shabbily made and creaking porches. Dust rose from the stamps of their feet, dirtying the clothes on their ankles. The small ruffians giggled as they chased and tagged each other, not a care in the world. Taun compared them to the big man-child she had led here, Hoku looked worse. The kids running had old and worn clothes fraying at the hem but Hoku’s attire had been washed so many times the color had faded, his jeans no longer blue. Not to mention the frankly ridiculous amount of patches sewn into them where holes of cloth couldn’t be put together. Hoku’s shoes were dirtied, the wood starting to splinter at the platform. Taun knew that he could afford to replace them, he had his own ways to make money—Hoku had bought her clothes when he took her in—but he never did. Of course she hadn’t known him for the longest of times but she still could not comprehend what importance they held. Maybe they held none, and he was just being as eccentric as ever. It was impossible to tell, really.

A middle aged woman, sweeping her porch stairs, set her broom against the wonky railing, smiling as she greeted Hoku and little Taun. “You were gone for so long, I had almost thought you wouldn’t be coming back.” Her name was Demm, probably, hopefully.  
Hoku’s smile was the same, uncaring, and boyish as it's always been, “Well I couldn’t just leave Taun here by herself,” he giggled a bit, it was honestly amusing how a woman he met a month or so ago would care so much of his well being. He could be a murderer for all she knew--oh, he forgot, he is.  
“That poor girl was pacing so much I thought she’d burn through the wood.” The stout lady chuckled gently, full of amusement, “she wouldn’t rest until I let her go find you. Don’t worry her so much. You shouldn’t be so uncaring in the future!”  
‘Until I let her,’? He honestly had to hold back a snort at that, knowing Taun she would have gone whether it was approved by some stranger or not, she probably just preferred letting the old lady know that she was alright. But there was a different part of that comment that caught his attention.  
Hoku smugly gazed upon the embarrassed and shifty eyed girl who finally acted like a child, fidgeting in place, hands fumbling with the blue fabric of her dress. It really was an adorable sight, one he never got to see. Taun was never so vulnerable, years on the streets had taught her that much. She was worried for him, ha! She’s so amusing.  
“I’ll be sure to keep that in mind!” He did not keep it in mind. 

“Thanks for watching her, Demm,” he hoped that was her name, it was very hard to remember unimportant peoples names and connect them to their faces. If it wasn’t then this was about to become very awkward. “Bye bye!” Hoku left with Taun scooped into his arms, leaving Demm coughing in the cloud of dust he left behind. She shook her head, lamenting that he acted more like a boy than a man. A really childish boy, might she add. Maybe that is his charm.

“Why did we leave so abruptly?” Taun lifted her head up, awkwardly straining her neck because of her position in the crook of Hoku’s arm.  
“Because we’ve got places to be, people to see. It’s not necessary to spend so much time on saying goodbye.” They weren’t ever going to meet Demm (if that was her name) again, so why spend so much time on her? There was no point in overly long speeches and farewells, they are stupid and meaningless.  
Taun responded with an unenthusiastic “oh”, he wasn’t sure if she understood or not but it didn’t really matter. 

Farewells should only be said when you’ll never return. Even then they were unbearable. Maybe it is especially so. 

*

“How long did you sleep for after the hunter exam?” Taun now nested on Hoku’s shoulders, a leg dangling from each side of his neck, not swinging them.  
“A week—“ Hoku paused a bit while his brain tried to keep up, “how’d you know I fell asleep?”  
“Because the hunter exam doesn’t take that long.” That wasn't the reason. It’s obvious, she had seen it happen once before, she knew the signs. The heavy dark rings habitually under his eyes faded slightly, he looked healthier, his skin less of a sickly white and his nen became calmer—less erratic. She wouldn’t explain it, she is sure Hoku realized it too. If not then he really didn’t have much right to know, not if he is that stupid. 

It was night again, Taun still sat on Hoku’s shoulders like a knight leading her steed onwards. They walked for hours like this until Taun’s stomach rumbled a lion's call to war, oh yeah, food. Oops, he kind of forgot. Ugh, children really were handfuls, huh?  
Hm, what was even edible out here? Grass, probably not, flowers, he doubted it, the corpse mushrooms were too far away, uh, small wildlife? This was going to be a pain. He pushed his en to a range that wouldn’t tire him out, it was maybe 35 meters? So far there were only small rodents, bugs, and ooh, a rabbit. That should be enough for Taun to eat.  
[En-learn to pronounce: eh-n. Defined as nen being spread out at a predetermined range as a detective measure. Or for stupid monkey brained people it is nen in bubble-like shape that can sense everything in it.] 

And so the poor deer horned rabbit was slayed and filayed. 

It went on like this for a few more days, they leisurely walked, Taun drinking from the occasional stream and eating the local wildlife. It was quite boring.

“Will we be there soon?” No matter how well behaved she was Taun was still a child, it was inevitable that she would grow tired of continuous walking. She didn’t even know if Hoku knew where they were going, when Hoku was taking her to stay with Demm, a butterfly had passed by, minding its own business, and Hoku followed it like a dog. Throwing their schedule into chaos.  
“Nope,” he paused, “should I start running?”  
“Why didn’t you do that before?” The answer: he hadn’t thought of it. But how could he say that to someone who already half disdained him? Wouldn’t she just become even more unimpressed with him? So he did the only reasonable thing, he ignored the entire question. He maintained his silence not knowing that his pursed lips and slightly red ears gave him away. Unknowingly a smile crept on her face, she’s really lucky.

With a speed that made Taun unable to let go from her grip on hoku’s head in fear of falling off it took less than a day to reach the next town, of course with a little prodding on Taun’s part to make sure Hoku didn’t get distracted. Again.  
They aren’t aware of which town they found, but it is a town.  
“Let’s go find a place to stay.” They couldn’t very well sleep on the streets. Well they could but that wouldn’t be too good, now would it?  
Taun asked him if he had any money, doubtfully scrutinizing him head to toe. She didn’t find it very likely. 

It isn’t true to say he doesn’t have any, he has billions saved in his debit card. The problem would be that he couldn’t remember the password to his account. So it was useless no matter how much money he had if he couldn't access it. He did not share this info, if he did she’d be even more inclined to look at him irritatedly.  
“Soon.” Hoku’s eyebrows jumped with humor. He didn’t like the way she looked back at him--underwhelmed. Internally he was a sobbing mess, what good was he if he couldn’t show off for his daughter?

They were in a different type of place than the small village from before, this one was cleaner, bigger, wealthier. That also meant that there would be more people that could afford to be stolen from.  
“Ah, crime. What is it this time? Robbery? Scams? Homeless bit?” They’ve known each other for almost a year (less than seven months), they’d gone over the same routine more than once.  
“Very smart! This time it’ll be pickpocketing. Do ya know how?” Taun shook her head left and right. “That’s okay! I’ll teach you later, for now I’m gonna stay on this street so you can watch. Wait over there till I’m done.” Hoku gestured to a pink cat cafe over to the right. He wanted to play with the kitties once he had finished! Petting furry friends! Scratching floofy chins! Pressing squishy paws! The possibilities are endless!

Alone, Hoku weaved his way amongst the crowd, slightly touching someone here and there. With nothing noticed, the people went on with whatever they deemed important, oblivious to the obvious.  
Trinkets and cash stuffed his cerulean daisy printed sweater. He borrowed—or rather stole—he's not that callous… he thinks—from the able bodied and the vulnerable. Hell, he even slid a string of gold from a wrinkly old bag’s neck. People certainly saw him, they just didn’t look closer. Honestly he should be grateful—it served only to make his life easier and theirs a little more disappointing. His pockets filled quickly thanks to the fodder, and he swiftly arrived to where he left Taun.

Taun sat on the steps of the cafe. People stared, but they didn’t matter so she paid them not the slightest of attention. Her small fingers twiddled with the straps of her shoes, outlining the shiny red color. It didn’t make sense to her, why someone would buy these. They looked expensive—more so than anything she’s ever had the chance to touch—polished and sturdy. They were for children, children who’d grow and stop wearing them in a few months. It seemed almost obscene for them to be on her feet.  
Amidst her mocking a shadow fell upon her and two elevated sandals—or ippon geta as Hoku claimed them as—came into view. Taun lifted her head and the rest of Hoku’s body entered sight. He was grinning exaggeratedly, making her wonder if his face ever froze like that, that would be amusing.  
Hoku continued grinning. “Miss me?”  
“As if.” She rose from her sitting position and shook the imaginary dust from her dress, she remained silent as she ignored him and entered the cat cafe without him, he followed hurriedly like a puppy afraid of being abandoned.


End file.
